In a fit of madness, I agreed to participate in a 'Blog Hop,' but only because I was asked by Marie Bilodeau, my good friend and fellow member of the East Block Irregulars. Anyone who knows Marie can attest to the fact that she is irresistible — the combination of infectious laugh and death threats does the trick.
Marie had already subverted the perfectly reasonable questions she had been given and proposed quite different ones for me to answer.
Quote from Marie:
Sooooo, I received four questions, which I think are boring. They are as follows:
1) What am I working on right now?
2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?
3) Why do I write what I do?
4) How does my writing process work?
I personally would prefer hearing from you how you'd answer THESE questions:
1. What research would you conduct to write a scene in which squirrels become the sole proprietors of the Febreeze Empire?
2. If you could conjure one mythical creature to finish a book for you, which one would get to select the ending and why?
3. Bigfoot sex. Discuss.
4. What would you need to do to become the most prolific writer ever (can include crimes, questionable science and lack of morality).
Of course, I've been a subversive longer than Marie has been alive and I will answer both sets of questions simultaneously.
1. As it happens I was working on a story that involved squirrels taking over the Febreeze Empire. I captured several squirrels (Note: don't put red and black squirrels in the same cage — they don't get along) and provided them with very tiny bottles of furniture cleaning fluid. Their lack of an opposable thumb made it impossible for them to operate the squeeze levers so I had to rig up a kind of harness they could manipulate with their tails. Disaster ensued. I've decided to switch to a series of mystery novels set in Paris between the wars. It requires more research but it is like to be a lot more fun.
2. Anyone who has read my fiction knows that I have conjured up several mythical creatures — mostly modern myths such as HAL from the movie 2001 — to finish my books. How else would I know what the inside of a computer's mind looked like? And without the spirit of Sam Spade how could I merge the noir mystery and SF cyberpunk genres?
3. I write what I do because I am obsessed with Bigfoot sex. Of course, they have to be consenting Bigfeet. {BIGFOOTS} Yeah, yeah, go back to the bedroom...
4. My writing process involves recruiting thousands of unpaid chimpanzee interns working on thousands of keyboards. Now you know how I wrote a novel in Three Days.
I was supposed to recruit three people for the next round but when your condo is filled with warring squirrels, mythical creatures, fornicating Bigfeet {BIGFOOTS} chimpanzees, time is at a premium. It's a wonder I got this done on the day assigned.
Matt Moore and Geoff Gander were also roped into this effort. Go check them out.
Marie had already subverted the perfectly reasonable questions she had been given and proposed quite different ones for me to answer.
Quote from Marie:
Sooooo, I received four questions, which I think are boring. They are as follows:
1) What am I working on right now?
2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?
3) Why do I write what I do?
4) How does my writing process work?
I personally would prefer hearing from you how you'd answer THESE questions:
1. What research would you conduct to write a scene in which squirrels become the sole proprietors of the Febreeze Empire?
2. If you could conjure one mythical creature to finish a book for you, which one would get to select the ending and why?
3. Bigfoot sex. Discuss.
4. What would you need to do to become the most prolific writer ever (can include crimes, questionable science and lack of morality).
Of course, I've been a subversive longer than Marie has been alive and I will answer both sets of questions simultaneously.
1. As it happens I was working on a story that involved squirrels taking over the Febreeze Empire. I captured several squirrels (Note: don't put red and black squirrels in the same cage — they don't get along) and provided them with very tiny bottles of furniture cleaning fluid. Their lack of an opposable thumb made it impossible for them to operate the squeeze levers so I had to rig up a kind of harness they could manipulate with their tails. Disaster ensued. I've decided to switch to a series of mystery novels set in Paris between the wars. It requires more research but it is like to be a lot more fun.
2. Anyone who has read my fiction knows that I have conjured up several mythical creatures — mostly modern myths such as HAL from the movie 2001 — to finish my books. How else would I know what the inside of a computer's mind looked like? And without the spirit of Sam Spade how could I merge the noir mystery and SF cyberpunk genres?
3. I write what I do because I am obsessed with Bigfoot sex. Of course, they have to be consenting Bigfeet. {BIGFOOTS} Yeah, yeah, go back to the bedroom...
4. My writing process involves recruiting thousands of unpaid chimpanzee interns working on thousands of keyboards. Now you know how I wrote a novel in Three Days.
I was supposed to recruit three people for the next round but when your condo is filled with warring squirrels, mythical creatures, fornicating Bigfeet {BIGFOOTS} chimpanzees, time is at a premium. It's a wonder I got this done on the day assigned.
Matt Moore and Geoff Gander were also roped into this effort. Go check them out.
RSS Feed
